The Baba Yaga Gingerbread House

A Baba Yaga Cookie House

Ingredients

Brown Royal Icing (Wilton recipe with less sugar)
White Royal Icing (Wilton recipe with less sugar)
Pretzels
Unassembled House
Powdered Sugar Dough

Royal Icing

The first batch I made of royal icing was a mess. I just threw it all in the mixer. I learned from that and did the sane and rational method on the second batch. Add liquid and meringue powder, let it whip. Slowly add the sugar until it's a good consistency. Getting a good brown color took a ridiculous amount of food coloring so if it comes up again, I'm going to reevaluate my approach to food coloring.

Decoration

I coated each side of the house with royal icing and arranged the pretzels for the log cabin look. I staggered the pretzels then went in and broke off pieces of pretzels to fill in the gaps. I did this for the roof too but it wound up being a little pointless considering I covered the roof with royal icing as snow.

For the door and window, I arranged the pretzels to make the gaps. I realized after the fact that I shouldn't have put the window on the opposite wall because that made it so either the window would be in the photo or the door but never both (live and learn). I added a piece of leftover Halloween chocolate for the door.

Assembling the House

I assembled the house with royal icing and used thicker pretzel rods on each corner, around the roof, at the top.

The Mistake

There was a tragic moment where I tried to execute my original plans for Baba Yaga's chicken legs. I had an idea about having the house on legs. Just thinking about it now, I can acknowledge how ill conceived the idea was. There was damage.

Repairs

I melted some sugar to reinforce portions of the roof that broke. It the first time I've worked with melted sugar. The melted sugar sets instantly, forms chunks and scares the crap out of me. I got the house back into shape and set it to dry for a day.

The New Plan

The next day (third day of housework) I made another batch of royal icing and a batch of sugar clay. Both wound up being too big and were incorporated into an improvised frosting recipe for a cake I'll make eventually.

The sugar clay was simple powdered sugar, water and yellow food coloring. I kept adding water until I got the right texture. I tasted it and the dough tasted like I injuring myself. This dough gave me a way to make chicken legs using pretzel sticks. I knew from the experience of the house falling apart that I wasn't going to make it stand. So Baba Yaga's house is sitting on her butt.

Finishing Touch

I attached a sprinkle with royal icing for a door knob and painted it with food paint to give a nice consistent look to the door.

I walked away knowing that if I kept messing with it then bad things would happen.

The Trials and Tribulations of Making a Gingerbread House

I Made a Gingerbread House

First "Gingerbread" House in years

I made my first gingerbread house when I was little. It was hard. I haven't really progressed much since then. Of course, I haven't tried to make one since then.

The house is chocolate cookies because I had the ingredients for chocolate cookies and I made up a recipe. I used meringue powder for the royal icing and a recipe that I had never tested before.

So much went sideways but sideways is exactly the way I like it.

Bake Off

I drew the house pattern out on cardboard with a pencil and a t-square. It went as well as this kind of project ever goes for me. I forgot key details like accounting for the thickness of the cookie.

The dough was an improvised chocolate recipe. I rolled out the dough and cut out each section of the house twice. I wasn't thinking far enough ahead to cut a window or door. I learned with this first house that I really need to get my dough thickness under control.

I cut out a couple extra pieces to replace sections that didn't come out well. I left the rest of the dough in the fridge in case I needed to redo another section.

The Pavee Siding

Ingredients
Unbaked House
Nonpareil sprinkles

I wet the house a little then coated one side the entire house with nonpareils. The nonpareils did not burn or melt in the oven. It gave a very nice consistent appearance.

The Glue

Half of a gingerbread house is royal icing. Not in quantity but significance as a decoration and glue to assemble the house.

I used Wilton's recipe for the royal icing. The recipe was too simple. I followed it without considering the recipe too hard and that's my mistake. I threw all the ingredients in the mixer and let it run. The next batch I mixed the recipe the logical way where I whipped the meringue powder and water then let that run. I added the powdered sugar a little at a time like a sane person. But with the first batch, the royal icing came out too thick. I made it work.

I was able to make a snowman out of royal icing by rolling it into balls. This was one of the first parts my nephews tore off when I gave them permission to destroy the house. Then they went after the sprinkles. This is where I will acknowledge the boys would have been just as impressed with a pile of sprinkles.

Conclusion

It was a mess, a problem and chaos and I did it.

Bloody Chocolate Chip Cookies

Bloody Ganache Filled Chocolate Chip Cookies

There's one recipe I can make from memory. Chocolate Chip Cookies. Everything else I check to make sure I'm not forgetting anything, even box cakes and I never follow the instructions I check. I've made them a million times and I know exactly how they should look at every stage.

My ideal chocolate chip cookie has a good crumb and is just slightly under done. Actually my ideal is the dough but when baked I like them soft.

Chocolate Chip Cookies is such a common recipe that it's not worth repeating here. Especially since there's usually a recipe on the chocolate chip bag.

Today's Variation

- Extra egg
- Almond extract
- Bloody filling

This was such a superficial desire. I just wanted cookies that looked a little bloody inside because the idea amused me (and I've been a little fixated on vampires lately for reasons I can't explain).

White Chocolate Ganache (Or the Bloody Filling)

Ingredients
2.5 ounces liquid
- 2 ounces Milk
- Red Food Coloring
- Vanilla
- dash of salt
5 ounces white chocolate chips
1 Tablespoon butter

The quantities are so low that the food coloring and any flavor augmentation can throw off the proportions. Because of the quantities and the fact that milk is not heavy cream, the resulting ganache never fully sets. This adds to the bloody look of the cookies with the insides coming out during baking.

If you want the ganache to stay completely hidden then make a thicker ganache. But like I said, I wanted bloody cookies. So for a thicker ganache, swap the milk for heavy cream.

Step 1: Microwave the milk, food coloring, salt and vanilla in 15 second intervals until the temperature reaches around 200 to 210 Fahrenheit. You don't need it to boil or want it to. The goal is to melt white chocolate chips and they melt easily. Keep the container covered with a piece of paper towel to protect your microwave from the food coloring through out this entire process.

Step 2: Pour the heated mixture over the chips. Leave it to sit for a couple minutes then stir until the ganache is perfectly smooth.

Step 3: Add the butter and stir until it melts.

Step 4: Pour the ganache into a glass casserole dish. I find the square Pyrex containers to be perfect for this (plus they have a lid). The only goal is to have the ganache even and flat. Put it in the fridge overnight.

Bloody Chocolate Chip Cookies

Any Reliable Chocolate Chip Cookie dough
Dyed White Chocolate Ganache

Step 5: Deposit a scoop of dough on the cookie sheet and put your thumb into the dough to make a hole with high sides. Fill with hole with the ganache. Cover carefully with more dough.

Step 6: Bake. The cookies may leak but just keep an eye on it. Turn on your fan if your worried about the leaked ganache burning on the pan and setting off your smoke alarm. It's going to be fine even if it looks tragic because that's kind of the point.

Step 7: Remove from pan immediately, especially if it leaked.

Have fun. Be creepy.

Not Following the Instructions Bread Loaf

"I didn't follow the recipe" Challah

This was my first attempt to bake to a temperature. This is an enriched bread so the target temperature is 200 degrees. I really enjoyed the lack ambiguity.

I found a few recipes for Challah online. I didn't follow them.

Ingredients

4 tsp yeast

1 cup milk

1/4 cup thick simple syrup

1 tsp sugar

1/4 cup sugar

3 eggs

1/4 cup melted butter

1 tsp salt 

4 cups bread

1 egg for an egg wash

Short Instructions

Mix everything together and turn it into bread.

Long Instructions

Step 1: Bloom the yeast in the milk with 1 teaspoon sugar.

Step 2: Pour flour, salt, 1/4 cup sugar into the bowl of your stand mixer.

Digression

If you're going to make a lot of bread, a stand mixer is a worthy investment. It makes everything so much simpler.

Step 3: Add the simple syrup into the yeast mixture. Pour the mixture into the stand mixer and turn on the mixer with the dough hook. 

Step 4: Add the eggs one at a time. Then add the melted butter.

Step 5: Let the dough hook do the hard part. Just let it run and read Rabbids with your nephew. If your dough seems a little stiff, add a little bit of oil.

Step 6: Turn your dough out onto a work surface with a little flour and need it for a bit. Punch it. Slap it. Get your nephew to wash his hands and help. The dough should not be sticky.

Step 7: Turn your dough into a ball by pulling the edges together. Turn it over and you'll have a nice smooth ball.

Step 8: Let your dough ball rise in an oiled bowl.Turn it over twice in the bowl to get the dough coated and keep the best side facing up. Then just let the yeast live.

Step 9: After it's risen, dump the dough out the counter. To get that sweeeeeeet braid, slice it into three pieces, roll into snakes and braid. Squeeze the ends together and tuck under the ends. Or do what I did and just keep braiding little snakes together till you have a loaf. The recipe can make two loaves or one over flowing loaf.

Tip

If you push into the rising dough and the indent doesn't immediately rebound then it's risen enough.

Step 10: Let loaf rise a second time in the pan of choice.

Step 11: Preheat oven 375 degrees.

About Temperatures

I don't have a digital temperature read on my stove and that always makes hitting the temperature a bit tricky. All stoves tend to vary in temperature. To counter this you can get a thermometer for your stove. Most baking happens in that 350 to 375 range, so if you get within that range, you're probably good. The tricks I think are paying attention to how the food is baking and know how it should look. Get to know how to work with your stove.

Step 12: Paint the bread with egg wash. Bake until internal temperature reaches 200 degrees. It will sound a little hollow when you tap it. If it starts to brown too much, tent it with aluminum foil.

I Made Pasta without a Pasta Machine

Stand Mixer Pasta

I made pasta with a stand mixer and a rolling pin and I broke a sweat doing it.

This can be done. It probably shouldn't be done. After an hour of struggling with pasta and a rolling pin with the pasta constantly rebounding and the rolling pin coming apart, you will realize the pasta machine might not be required for home pasta production but it's required for your sanity.

I used the Bon Appetit pasta recipe and added some water to get it workable. I had a different plan for the pasta dough. The original plan got scrapped so the dough turned into dinner.

The original recipe at Bon Appetit is superbly basic eggs, flour, oil, salt. It never occurred to me that I could just throw it all in my mixer and let that do the work. I am unconvinced whether this is a better method than doing it from start to finish by hand.

When working with a dough by hand, there's room to change the recipe in the moment when it's not working.

There's nothing wrong with the Bon Appetit recipe. I got a good dinner out of it. It's just the wrong recipe for me.

I would like to try again with flavors or colors incorporated into the dough. But I'm not ready to invest in a pasta machine.

How to Fix your Dough when it feels like everything is going wrong

Hard to the point of inspiring rage? Wet the dough a bit and knead in the water.

Sticky? Dust the counter with flour and knead it.

Don't overcorrect. Just add a little. A dash or a drop.

Pale Coconut Oil Sugar Cookies

Pale as Possible Cookies

What to do with the pile of dough in the Fridge for which you never really have a plan.

I needed eyes for Cookie Monster. I wanted to get the dough as white as possible for the sake of aesthetics. Then I had leftovers.

Coconut Sugar Cookies

1 cup coconut oil
1 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
4 tablespoons of egg whites
3 tablespoons milk
3 cups flour

Short Instructions

Creaming method

Long Instructions

Step 1: Beat together the coconut oil and granulated sugar. The coconut oil was solid when I did this.

Step 2: Beat in the baking powder and salt.

Step 3: Beat in the egg whites and the milk.

Step 4: Beat in the flour.

How I Used it

Use 1: Cookie Monster's Eyes

Use 2: Cookie tarts

Use 3: Sprinkle bowls

Use 4: Bat cookies with strawberry filling (the favorite version)

I baked them at 350. They were all slightly different so I pulled them as soon as I glimpsed golden brown.

No Plan Baking

No Plan Baking

One key to baking without a plan is to know enough recipes and know enough about the science of baking to be able to come up with ideas on the fly and rescue a recipe that has gone tragically wrong. The other key is to have the confidence to risk a waste of your time and ingredients.

Know the desired texture of doughs and batters. Chemical leavened cake batter should be liquid but not loose. Egg white leavened cake batter should be a bit thicker. This is an instinct to develop for the reckless baker.

Start by basing your recipe off existing recipes. Learn the fundamentals of baking. Learn what the results should look like and what they should feel like.

Mostly, just bake with hubris.