Be a Better Person

Steps to Self-Improvement

Why?

I will never be satisfied with just good enough. Self improvement is a virtuous act that I wish to practice. It's hard because it requires the admission of flaws but I've never had a hard time finding my own flaws.

Self Evaluation

First step, take a hard look at myself and other people. Determine which qualities I like. I like people who are kind, happy and charitable. I like people who are honest and respectful. I like people who are creative. 

Then consider the qualities I don't like about myself. I suffer from obsessive thoughts. If I don't act fast and deal with them then I will wind up in a cycle of painful thoughts. I don't think about other people half as much as I think about myself. There are times that I understand that this is all in my head but if I'm too deep down the rabbit hole of self loathing, it's harder to believe that and it's even harder to dig myself out. I can be judgmental and make decisions based on emotional impressions, not facts. I can be impulsive.

Specific Steps

The things I like and dislike are abstracts. They are not steps. That makes them useless. To make them useful, I will create steps towards the goal of cultivating the virtues or lessening the flaws.

Kind

Make people feel good by making the small gestures that show they are appreciated.

1. Pay people compliments.
2. Be patient.

Happy

This is the hardest one for me. My brain does not always accommodate happy. So I have to fight harder for it.

1. Appreciate what I have.
2. Embrace the activities I love.

Charitable

I don't think the most important charity is always giving money to other people. Charity is just doing for others and I feel really good when I do good things for the people around me.

1. Make time to be helpful.
2. Do things to help the people around me.

Honest

This one is harder. It feels like there's nothing that people can make me feel worse about than the truth. It's hard to be honest because the truth is not always nice or what people want to here. Honesty is not always right. So maybe it's important to find what honesty to give and what honesty to keep. 

1. Take a hard look at myself and the world.
2. Find the nicer truths about the world.

Creative

I think I am creative. But I don't think I focus my creativity. I need to use it. I need to make use of it.

1. Find creative solutions to everyday problems.

Obsessive Thoughts

This isn't a thing that can be fixed quickly if at all. I've been trying to fix this for a long time. Maybe I can't because perhaps it's just the way my brain works.

One of the obsessions is that I am fearful of the outcome of my actions. I would genuinely hate it if my choice or action made another person suffer for any reason. I wouldn't be able to get past it. This makes me seem thoughtless at times because I really try not to think. I like easy and simple approaches to life. But as I get older, I've started to think that not thinking is just a quick fix. It's scary because the questions I face are getting harder everyday and the answers are getting more difficult. As I think about them, my awareness of the impact of my actions makes me hurt inside. Sometimes I can't give the correct answers no matter how much I want to. I'm just trying not to hurt anyone. I don't always succeed but I really try.  

1. Cut myself some slack.
2. Be mindful.

Judgement

I don't know what to do about this. The deeper I dig into what I don't like about myself, the harder this post is to write. I guess this circles back around to my obsessive thoughts. I don't know how to not judge myself. Maybe I have to keep judging myself but I need to be positive to balance my natural negativity.

1. Practice positive affirmations.

Impulsive

I am not someone that people would describe as impulsive. But they don't have my view. I say things and then I regret them later.

1. Think first, think second, speak third.

So, is this enough?

Is wanting to be a better person enough? I don't know. I will never stop trying to be a better person even if I always feel wanting.

If nothing else, I just hope everyone knows that I am trying. I am always trying to be a good and honorable person. I think that's as much as anyone can ask of me.